A well-organized peer mentoring session gives students a predictable place to learn from one another, practise useful skills, and ask for support without being expected to solve every problem alone. Use the steps below to plan a session that supports belonging, bullying prevention, and responsible digital life while keeping adult guidance and student choice in view.
1. Set a focused purpose
Start by naming what participants should be able to do by the end. A session can address a broad theme such as belonging, but it works better when the activity has one manageable outcome: for example, “identify two ways to respond when a classmate is excluded from a group chat” or “practise asking a peer for help with a difficult assignment.”
Choose a purpose with input from students, educators, or the group that will attend. Ask what would make the time useful, then turn the answers into a session goal. Avoid asking students to disclose personal experiences of bullying or online harm as the price of participation. Use fictional scenarios, general questions, or optional written reflections instead.
Match the format to the group
Decide whether the meeting is a one-time workshop, a recurring check-in, or part of a longer mentoring relationship. A first meeting needs more time for introductions, expectations, and comfort. A continuing group can spend more time reviewing progress and practising a skill. Keep the group small enough that each participant has a chance to contribute; if attendance is large, use pairs or small groups and plan adult supervision accordingly.
Agree in advance who the mentors are and what they can reasonably offer. Peer mentors can listen, share strategies, help someone find school resources, and model respectful communication. They should not be positioned as counselors, investigators, disciplinarians, or substitutes for a trusted adult.
2. Prepare a safe and accessible learning space
Choose a place that is easy to reach, reasonably quiet, and visible to responsible adults without making conversation feel like a public performance. Arrange chairs in a circle or around a table so participants can see one another. Leave a clear path for movement and offer a quieter seat or alternate way to participate, such as writing or drawing.
Check practical needs before the session:
- Confirm the room, time, expected group size, and any access needs with the appropriate school contact.
- Put out only the supplies required, such as paper, pens, prompt cards, or a shared board.
- Make the agenda visible so participants know what is coming and when the session will end.
- Consider language, reading level, sensory comfort, and mobility when choosing activities.
- Provide a way to pass on a question or take a short break without explanation.
If the group meets online, use a school-approved platform and follow the organization’s existing rules for accounts, recording, chat, and supervision. Tell participants whether the session will be recorded; when recording is unnecessary, leave it off. Offer a non-video way to join when practical, and avoid sharing personal contact details or private links outside the intended group.
Make participation voluntary and predictable
Explain the session’s purpose, length, and basic structure at the start. Let participants know they may pass on a prompt, step out, or ask to speak with an adult separately. Do not promise absolute secrecy: a mentor should explain that if someone may be unsafe, the concern needs to go to a responsible adult under the school’s established process. State this calmly before sensitive discussion begins.
3. Set ground rules together
Ground rules make respectful participation concrete. Invite the group to suggest a few, then clarify them in plain language. A short list is easier to remember than a long code of conduct.
Useful agreements include:
- Listen without interrupting; make room for people who have not spoken.
- Critique ideas or choices without insulting a person.
- Do not repeat another participant’s personal story outside the group, except when getting adult help for a safety concern.
- Do not pressure anyone to share, agree, or explain an identity or experience.
- Ask before offering advice; sometimes a person wants to be heard first.
- Discuss online behavior without forwarding messages, screenshots, usernames, or identifying details.
Clarify what “respect” means in practice. Participants may disagree, but jokes about someone’s appearance, identity, ability, or background can shut down participation. If a comment causes harm, pause, name the behavior without labeling the speaker, and redirect toward repair and safety. A peer mentor should not be left to manage repeated harassment alone; involve the designated adult contact.
4. Use a simple session structure
A clear sequence reduces awkward starts and leaves enough time to act on the topic. Adjust the timing to the available period rather than rushing participants through every activity.
| Part | Suggested share of session | What to do |
|---|---|---|
| Welcome and check-in | About 10% | Greet participants, review the purpose, and offer a low-pressure opening prompt. |
| Ground rules and focus | About 10% | Revisit agreements and introduce one specific question or skill. |
| Main activity | About 45% | Explore a scenario, practise a response, or work on a shared learning task. |
| Reflection and next steps | About 20% | Invite takeaways, identify support needs, and agree on one small action. |
| Close | About 15% | Summarize, thank participants, and explain how to get help between sessions. |
These proportions are a planning guide, not a rule. For a short meeting, use one activity and a brief closing. For a longer session, include a movement or quiet break. Keep a few minutes in reserve so a difficult question does not force an abrupt ending.
Example: responding to exclusion in a group chat
Present a fictional scenario: a class group chat makes plans while leaving one student out, and another participant is unsure whether to say anything. Ask the group to consider what the person might notice, what choices are available, and when adult help is appropriate. Have pairs practise a low-risk response, such as checking in privately with the excluded student or asking the group to include everyone in the relevant school activity.
Do not ask participants to show real messages or identify classmates. If someone raises a current incident, listen without demanding proof or conducting an investigation. Offer to connect them with the appropriate adult after the session, using the school’s established support process.
5. Support bullying prevention without making students responsible for it
Peer mentoring can reinforce belonging and help students recognize supportive choices, but it cannot guarantee that bullying will stop. Keep the distinction clear: students can practise safe ways to include, interrupt, or seek help; adults and the school remain responsible for responding to reported concerns through their established procedures.
Discuss a range of responses rather than teaching one script as universally safe. Depending on the situation, a student might:
- Check in with the person affected in a private, non-pressuring way.
- Avoid joining in, reacting with laughing emojis, or spreading a hurtful post.
- Use a calm, brief interruption if it feels safe, such as “Let’s not make this personal.”
- Save relevant information only in a way permitted by school guidance, and show it to a trusted adult rather than circulating it.
- Ask an adult for help, especially when behavior repeats, threats are involved, or someone may be in immediate danger.
Never require a mentor to confront a student, mediate between people where there is a power imbalance, or keep a safety concern secret. If a participant describes immediate danger, follow the school’s established emergency and safeguarding procedures. If no specific procedure is known, contact the responsible school adult promptly rather than improvising an investigation.
6. Include digital citizenship in ordinary mentoring
Digital citizenship is more useful as a set of habits than as a lecture about “screen time.” Connect it to the group’s real learning and relationships: how to communicate in shared spaces, check before posting, protect privacy, handle conflict, and pause before forwarding material.
A practical activity is to compare possible replies to a fictional disagreement in a class discussion board. Ask which response is clear, respectful, and likely to help; discuss how tone can be misunderstood in text. Then invite participants to revise an unhelpful message without naming a real person or platform account.
Cover these prompts as relevant:
- Audience: Who could see this message now or later?
- Consent: Is it okay to share this image, story, or screenshot? Has the person agreed?
- Privacy: Does the post reveal personal information that is not needed for the conversation?
- Impact: Could a joke, pile-on, or forwarded post isolate someone?
- Pause: Would waiting, asking a trusted person, or moving the conversation offline improve the response?
Do not tell students that deleting a post always removes every copy, or that every digital disagreement can be solved by blocking someone. Platform features and school practices differ, and evidence may matter in some situations. For a serious concern, avoid forwarding content and seek guidance from the appropriate adult or school contact.
7. Give mentors practical roles and boundaries
Before the meeting, review the plan with mentors and identify an adult they can reach during or after the session. Give mentors simple responsibilities: welcome participants, read a prompt, watch for anyone being left out, and help close with next steps. Rotate roles so the same student is not always expected to lead or carry emotional work.
Teach mentors a few useful conversation moves:
- “Would you like me to listen, brainstorm with you, or help find an adult?”
- “You can pass if you don’t want to answer.”
- “I’m glad you told me. Let’s find the right adult to help.”
- “I can’t promise to keep a safety concern secret, but I can stay with you while we get help.”
Mentors should avoid diagnosing, promising outcomes, investigating allegations, or sharing advice beyond their experience. If they are unsure how to respond, pausing and asking the adult contact is a sound choice. Adults should also check in with mentors after a difficult session, without asking them to retell private details to the group.
8. Troubleshoot common problems
One person dominates. Thank them for contributing, then invite a different format: “Let’s hear from someone who hasn’t spoken yet, or take a minute to write first.” Do not force a specific participant to speak.
Nobody wants to answer. The prompt may feel too personal, abstract, or difficult. Offer a fictional example, let participants discuss in pairs, or give quiet writing time. A pause is not necessarily a failure; use it to clarify the question rather than filling every second.
A participant shares a serious concern. Listen, stay calm, and avoid promising secrecy or asking a string of investigative questions. Explain that you will help connect them with the designated adult. Follow the school’s process promptly and share only what is needed with the responsible person.
The group gets off topic. Acknowledge the conversation, restate the session’s goal, and offer to note another topic for a future meeting. If the detour signals an urgent safety concern, prioritize getting adult help over finishing the agenda.
An activity excludes someone. Stop and adjust the format. A participant may need a nonverbal option, a different partner arrangement, clearer instructions, or a break. Ask what would help without making them explain their needs to the whole group.
9. Close with a useful follow-up
End by asking participants to name one idea they may use, one thing that would improve the next meeting, or one question they still have. They can share aloud, write anonymously, or pass. Avoid collecting sensitive stories or unnecessary personal details in feedback forms.
Before participants leave, repeat the route to help: name the trusted adult or school contact they can approach and explain how to reach them during the school day. If a concern arose, make the handoff according to the established process and confirm that the responsible adult has received it. Do not rely on a peer mentor to monitor the situation alone.
For a recurring group, review the next meeting’s purpose and one small action, such as trying a welcoming check-in or practising a respectful online reply. At the next session, ask what was useful and what needs changing. Keep attendance, notes, and follow-up information limited to what the school’s ordinary procedures require, and store or share them only through approved channels.